PRE-Cancer...

Earlier this month I had my yearly pap with my gynecologist. Its always awkward and uncomfortable but quick and painless. This year was just like all the others, Except the results. I have had an abnormal pap before when I was sixteen. They and done a procedure called a kopal. Its basically a biopsy of your cervix. It hurt like HELL! (But the results came back normal) Now they wanted me to have it done again. GREAT.. They don't even give you anything for the pain, which is STUPID.... I figured that since I have had one before that I could deal with the pain and it wouldn't be a big deal.. Yes, I was still nervous but I could handle it. It would be just like last time.. They will do the stupid thing, get the normal results back, and I would go on my marry way.. I was WRONG...

I had the kopal done again.. Waited for the results.. Finally the nurse had called me. She started with "I have some news." That is never good! She goes on to tell me there are three stages of PRE-Cancer then Cancer. (Mild, Moderate, Severe, then Cancer) Well I have moderate... Now they want to do something called a LEEP.. As I understand it they numb your cervix. Then FREEZE a cone shape out of the middle of it.. At this point in the conversation I'm freaking out.. Thinking that its going to HURT like CRAZY... (I'm not good with putting my self through VOLUNTARY PAIN!) She asked me when would be a good time to come in and have it done.. (NEVER..!) So I told her that sometime later on this month would work. We settled on the 26th.. (YAY... NOT..!)

I'm really nervous and my mom is so not helping the situation.. (I know shes worried about me..) She keeps calling me just to ask if I'm OK.. (Well yeah I haven't gone to have the procedure yet..) I told her if she calls again to ask before it happens I'm going to turn my phone OFF.. So she hasn't...!

I have talked to a couple of people that have had the LEEP done before and got different answers from each.. So I have no clue what to expect....